keep going...

it's being bz days getting all the planning in place and schedule fixed.   it's all worth it.  all the hard work, effort, time, money... not wasted.  although tired, phoenix still happy.  there's will there's way.. never give up single hope, nothing is impossible with willing heart.

cheerssss

bao bei happy b'day

it's 4 yrs ord.. bao bei, mommy wish u good health and happy always.  on the day of her b'day, daddy sent you a b'day message ; Happy Birthday to bao bei, daddy and mummy love you very much and be happy always! from daddy on 5th sept 2010, 12am.

when u read this blog one day, do remember tat how much we luv u.. u must luv urself as you're our life and we luv u wholehearted.  we have fight for your life so you must treasure every second of it and lead a meaningful and colourful life everyday.

just finish watch one show on tv... about one mother who nvr ever thinking to lost hope as her son is blind from young.. she let him go to normal school as she want him to grow up as normal as possible.. he's 14 today.. and told the world, 'mom, i might not be able to see your face for this life, however, if there's next life i hope i'll still be able to find u and be your son'

last week my princess was admitted to hospital for 'suspected dengue' huh... at first it was just normal fever.. gave her fever syrup.. first day okay.. second day okay .. third day.. hmmm hw come her body tempreture seems not so OK.. after a thought.. asked her dad tat just came home to send us to clinic to check... the doc. straight away do blood test as there's too many dengue reported...

blood taken, doc. came out from his lab.. mdm, i think u'll have to bring ur gal to hospital now immediately as her blood pallete only at 24 plus.. huh my heart drop at tat point as normal shld be between 100-150... gosh panic.. tears just keep falling ... called grandma, call yima calling for help and motivation... call god call whoever for motivation....

straight away admitted her, blood taking... princess cried her heart out it's really painful hearing her screaming for help.. both her hand and foot all blue black... first dengue test - negative.. do second time - negative.. huh as other then her blood pallete drop there's others ... blood Phoenix dun understand wat's tat but it's part of blood as well also drop.. makes doc. worried same make Phoenix worried.. called our spore specialist doc. for princess..to standby in case any emergency we will rush there.. haiz... it's really scared me to hell ... tat time Phoenix keep asking for mercy of great do not ever take her from me.. it's not her time yet... please please please.. first nite cant sleep as worried her fever will up.. second nite her blood pallete still no up.. 3rd day still not up... Phoenix keep chanting and get member to help to chant for Princess.. 4th day... her blood finally make improvement increase to 46 then nite time 76.. then next day 106 huh.. we've finally won the battle again tis time.. it's finally diagnose at viral fever.. :(

thank you those tat send regards, my cousin tat visited us although she's bz with her work... and my family tat keep supporting me .. not forgetting the doc. and nurse at hospital tat's so frenzly and caring during our stay there as Princess condition is special tat's why they've pay extra care on her.. thnk you very much for all your frenzly care... may u be blessed wth gd health

battle

it's being a while since the last visit from Phoenix.. thnking of update latest happening here.. Princess done her follow up for her eyes... great improvement .. yeeepeee so happy.. no need operations so far as per optologist thnks god being mercy with her.  Follow up wth her neuro too.. as advice we're going to wean off one of her med. hmmm.. quite worried the last few days.. as worried the worst might happen.. keep the emergency dose close to Phoenix all the time... pls pls pls pls gohonzon.. protect her from any harm... it's being more then 3 yrs... pls pls pls pls pls.. it's enough as Phoenix really feel heart pain and sometimes really stop breathing when the thg happen... as she's part of me.. it feels so painful and helpless only mercy of the great and help...Phoenix beg for mercy shld there be anythg tat need to be done... let Phoenix handle it... don't harm the little body anymore .. she's tired too... Phoenix still believe in miracle.. Nam Myo-ho Renge Kyo... it's like a roar of lion... turn the poison to medicine.. we will win tis battle... and must win in this battle YES.. baobei we can do it ;)

Never Give Up

http://news.yahoo.com/video/us-15749625/autistic-student-s-inspirational-graduation-speech-20371829

Just watch the link above and it really inspire Phoenix lots.  Yah always believe there's hope, never give up... there's will there's way!

sickness...

As normal human being Phoenix guess there's no way we can excape from 'sickness' big or small .... sometimes really thinking why it happen.. share lots wth tinkerbell lately on tis topics.. hahahaha we're all lay man so it's pretty normal getting discourage when heard nt so gd news.. ppl said we thnk too much.. nt thnk is also problem ... remember one of my gd frenz told me... spend while we can as some ppl can even enjoy ord be angel khi hahahahaha...it's really interesting talking about tis topics.

Remember Phoenix told her frenz before.. if spend all gt emergency how??? her frenz replied : so many emergency lor .... neh... gam gam gt emergency happen lor hahahahaha tat's why it's hard for us to predict what's going to happen coz no matter hw great u're... we are not GOD!  saw this sentence last few days.. god give and take so treasure every moment possible. 

Honestly talk about 'sick' phoenix very phobia...... lately health nt so gd.. cant really breath normal, getting giddy lots, there's time phoenix asking not to be angel so fast hahahahaha coz worried it might happen ... we cant predict what's next ;p sigh... do hope grant me longer life hehehehehe coz lots of thg not done and complete and lots of lots of ... thg want to do.. havent really enjoy Phoenix life yet so......be mercy wth Phoenix ;) hahahahaha

hmmm need to continue my assignment again... zzzz

Tired..

feeling really tired.. tired of life tired of everything... dun knw why just feeling very very very very tired.. s$%^... sometimes really thinking why should we need to go through all this... will there be a better world then here???  a lot of times, really have a thought tat leaving this world and go to another world should be better.. will it!!! sigh.. c how long can stay put.................... everything seems to be so far to reach.. everything done is nt rite... every... all wrong... just feeling very very tired.. shld have a rest nw.. zzzzz

arghhhh

haiz.... sitting on her desk one whole day can't even get something out of her brain... s#$%^^(@*$!@#$%^&* really frust... tis one really hard ah ma woi..... dead man.... tat's make Phoenix visit her blog a while.. it's being a while since she stop writing as need to concentrate on her assignment and project.. however, today is really a bad darn day.... nothing .. NOTHING frm her brain... cham cham .. clock is tickling ah pa woi... hahahhahaa haiz.. forget it.. need to have gd rest nw.. tomorrow then only start to crack tis brain... arghhhhhhhhhh sob sob... 

happy..

Completed one of my assignment a while ago.. huh... happy happy ... still gt 5 more to go... jia you jia you.. rush like no body business... still happy heheheh at least gt some improvement ...

bye bye... ironman :(

sigh... today Phoenix 'ironman' finally rest in peace... poor 'ironman' as she is Phoenix fav. but what to do... when it's time, let go - that's what we learn rite! so peacefully Phoenix send her Ironman to graveyard.  Since ord planned to get one more companion.. Ironman was replaced by 'siao pai' and Phoenix get another frenz for 'siao pai' that's 'pinky'.  oh yah.. Phoenix gt 'lao pai' with her for about a year now present from Tinkerbell.  For now Phoenix have 3 companian 1) lao pai 2) siao pai and pinky... do hope they live happily together and live long at least for 3 yrs la hehehehe..

k all the above companian is Phoenix handphone wakakakaka...

Expectation!

Someone told Phoenix.. "that kid is 3 yrs old and he's so chatty"... hmmmm at first Phoenix dun really feel anything .. but after yesterday nite sleep.. erm .. feel a bit 'tired'. 

Do really understand! As parents there's always expectation for our kid, to be smart then others, to be better then others, everything if can... better then others.  Before having own kids, Phoenix ord have a planned tat shall raise her kid up 'happy'.  Whether they're 'smart' or not, more important they must be growing up happy and well.  How many successful people is really doing well when they were 'young'?   yah, indeed it is not easy to bring up kid like my gal.  Imaging have to feed princess every morning and evening without fail or else there might be complication.  It pains Phoenix heart and it serve a reminder to Phoenix to live everyday to fullest.  Enjoy every moment of our life. 

Someone asked Phoenix 'since she's okay now, dun have to c specialist'!!!! well, may Phoenix throw this ball back to them?  what will they respond? will you let your kid suffer should you still able to afford the fees?   why let her take so many vitamins? hmmm if dun have to.. will any parents still do so?  don't let her go to 'tat' school?  who dun wish to provide your kid the best ever school..... well, Phoenix indeed very upset when ppl sometimes just so ignorance and keep repeated throwing this question back to Phoenix.  and the best part is should they are same person... @#$%^&*!@#$^#% most of the time Phoenix just smile and walk away but deep inside it hurts :(

Phoenix keep moving and live for her gal now, so please do not hurt her feeling further as that's the main goal of her life.. Phoenix enjoy her day with her princess.  It might not easy but for Phoenix, thing happen for reason! it regardless what ppl said ... let it be cause she's my kid.. I'll love her no matter what happen.. blessed us instead of so many untowards comments.

Phoenix expectation for her princess - live well and happy
Phoenix expectation for those who care - be happy

hihihihi

Sori ya members.. need to remove my 'virgin' slide as ... want to do more pro one so.. wait for next one ya.. but hor.. have to wait about 2 months as Phoenix is really busy rushing for her assignments and project.. (cross her fingers) hope can completes by then or else.. have to wait longer wahahahaha..

luv ya!

my fav food

hmmm going to eat all my fav. food, assam laksa, rojak, fried siakap with soy sauce, manggo salad, abc special, bak kut teh, fish curry, japanese food, korean food, steamboat, sambal fish, gong gong,  bbq salt fish, sea ham, fish head bee hoon, dim sum, porridge, wah wah wah.. all my fav.  when back at Sibu only eat cha sian... heard about tat name also scared... but my Naruto luv it hahahaha..

tis saturday going to have thai manggo salad first.. miss this so much yum yum

yeah Naruto.. make it!

Yesterday, Naruto show me his BM results... wah tremendous improvement! good job Naruto.. jia you jia you! c as long as we put in more effort it wont be wasted. 

Often the greatest adversity we face is the opposition that takes place inside of us - our own self doubts

It isn't always others who enslave us.  Sometimes we let circumstances enslave us; sometimes we let routine enslave us; sometimes we let things enslave us; sometimes, with weak wills, we enslave ourselves - Richard L. Evans

Naruto... next trip Phoenix back do hope to c further improvement k... luv u

Back at HOME

Feel so good to be HOME... Phoenix miss her home so much as this is the place where she find her own self the most.  Do what she like.. what she want... what she loves... yeah.. home is the best.  After so many months doing setting up of Phoenix business.. the first phase is done! Great relieved.. feeling really happy!  Learn lots of thing in this process.. thank you sifu for your advice and information. 

It is indeed not easy to do own business hehhehehe.. but if don't try how we know rite..it's really great experiences.. running up and down, right and left, back and forth... sometimes getting dizzy coz lost direction.. from one department to another department.. one floor to another floor.. cham...if this what all the business owner do??? hahahaha crazy man... Phoenix really hope the 'government' can plan something more flexible and advance for this kind of processes... can do online bah!! now so high-tech ord still do manual work... waste taxpayer money..

Being at hometown so many months was great experiences as well.  Leaving hometown more then 10 years ago to further study and work make Phoenix hardly be back hometown for more then a month period.  As this time is for business purposes, Phoenix back hometown for more then ... hmmmm.. wah.. nearly 6 months... time flies ... hearing lots of updates of all my family members hahahahaha... Phoenix luvs them lots .... whenever Phoenix need someone to help ... there's someone sure be there to help up!  that's what we call FAMILY!

Phoenix have one Big Family... we hardly differentiate by 'cousin' 'nephew' and bla bla bla as for us... we are one 'FAMILY'! respect each other is more important in our FAMILY it's regardless young and old, big or small.  Honestly it was really hard to find family like ours hahahahaha.. our family really BIG wakkakakak even Phoenix get confuse most of the time who is who... don't care la as long as they smile at Phoenix... Phoenix smile la wahahahahah.. more is better bah ;P  remember this year CNY, some of Phoenix cousin have to self intro to Phoenix as Phoenix totally dun have any clue who are they hahahahhahaa... looking at their cute face make Phoenix feel fully and admire this little boys... Phoenix getting older & forgetful each day so hope you all can remember Phoenix instead hehehehee..

Read Tinkerbell post a while ago... hahahahaha yah indeed when Phoenix small no one dare to come close to Phoenix... same goes to today my dear.. hehehehe oh ya one thing need to be corrected.. Phoenix only tell the truth k ;P so... dun complaint wakakakakaka... coz u gals too many secret babe la la la la la...  Phoenix luv to be those that true to heart so... you know who u are hahahahaha.. Phoenix not the person that know how to keep unhappiness 'inside' ... Phoenix is an open book... happy or not.. it all shows hahahahahaha.. this is what we call personality babe wakakakakkaa..

F - reedom
A - ttitude
M - agnanimity
I - ndependent
L - oyalty
Y - outh

That's what family stand for.. so enjoy ya!  till we meet again ;P

Memories..

Woke up at 4am today... too tired .. body aching, leg numb.. sore throat... haiz... Phoenix cannt get sick... huh.. how!! hahahahaha.. find thing to do so can sweat... hmmmm rearrange my room.  move my stuff here and there.. one hour pass, mop the floor... another hour pass - sweat like hell... cool! raining yeah... cooling... worst - feel more pain over my body hahahhahahaha Phoenix enjoy it anyway as after arrange the room.. Phoenix sat down and look at her room.

wah...so many toys, didn't realises that Phoenix is the princess of their heart sometimes ago hahahahaha.. seeing Phoenix graduation photo... year 2000 wahsen... young at heart more important hehehehehehe... looking at all my course mate face.. wonder where are there now?  are they doing well? may they be blessed with good health always!

Seeing one of the present dad gave Phoenix on her b'day .. more then 15 years ago - it's music box (big flower music box)  Phoenix try to spin the botton to see whether it's still working... yeah.. heard the music - close to u! 15 years ago.. Phoenix too young to understand the meaning.. today... Dad, thank you..I know you're always close to me.. Love you always!

Phoenix first watch... bought by super mom when she was in s'pore for Rain operations.. that was more then 20 years ago!.. although the watch stop clicking now.. Phoenix still kept it well ....as for Phoenix, all the gift have their sentimental value.  hmmm maybe should fixed the watch.. k.. will find day to do so :)

Yesterday Tinkerbell gave Phoenix small gift also.. it's her earing - thank you, Phoenix will treasure it ... Phoenix guess she must forgot what have she gave Phoenix 10 years ago... well ... jeng jeng jeng... Phoenix found this 'Piggy Bank' yah.. it's Pig coin saver :( and hor it's ceramic one ... haiz.. and the best part is this pig hor.. haiz haiz haiz.. the nose c beh big eh... still remember that time they still jokes that the nose like 'ROSE' eh nose wakakakakkaa..honestly till today Phoenix hardly look at that PIG hahahahhahaa as it's too ugly.. hmmm time to fill it up... thank you Tinkerbell anyway...heeeheeeheee

And lots of lots of toys.. from my 'admirer' (long time ago k), frenz and relatives... thank you for giving Phoenix so many sweet memory! 

It's good day to start my day... happy happy day!

*ps don't send Phoenix soft toy as gift .... she've sinus.. can't stand the dust - advance thnks ya heeeheeheee luv u all... muacksss

Be freeee.. yeah

yeah yeah yeah... finally, today is last day of my express training course.  huh..relieved!  This is not the end babe, they need to submit project wakakakaka.. Phoenix love them.  To learn something new, we need to put in lots of effort so that when you see the results... you will be able to appreciates and feel the joy. 

hmmmm very nice student, fast learner, curious, patience and hardworking.  Heard from them that when they first heard about this field they don't think it's workable hehehehe.. now they are gearing for this line hahahahhaa.. it regardless of any field, there is need to be pro.  Trust in own self is the best motivation tool.  Always believed that thing will work out should we put in effort ofcoz.. need some lucks too ;P

Changing line from different industry have make most of Phoenix family members and working partner a shocked ;P.. well well well, Phoenix didn't realise that with this decision it has created such a havoc in some 'sense'.  Would really love to share why this decision come by... thank you to those that care on Phoenix decision.. Phoenix is doing well and happy :)

Someone told Phoenix that.. ppl have being saying that Phoenix have gone mad as why tender such a high post??? hahahahha..being away from home and working for ppl more then 10 yrs it's really tough tough job.. it's being quite a while that Phoenix want to start own thing .. just don't have that COURAGE.  Thing change when the arrival of little princess in 2006. 

Princess conditions getting serious in year 2007... in and out of H have being norm and tiring.  Keep applying for leave to do her follow up.  Can't concentrate on work and distraction affected Phoenix working performance. Finally Phoenix decided to tender.  Boss keep asking to take leave and come back when princess is getting better, Phoenix really thanks all the bosses understanding.. till now, the door is still open for Phoenix to be back to corporate world - Lao Pan xie xie

Remember my little princess sharing... she have health issue (hard to explain here as it's long long long story) she's doing well now - no worry keep praying for my princess.  After attending the course which most of Phoenix family member attended.. firmed up Phoenix decision.  So my dear friends, it was not the course that asking Phoenix to tender... it's Phoenix decision that make Phoenix to decide :)  No one able to tell us what to do unless we want to ... we are our own master!

Phoenix love princess lots.. that's why Phoenix make this decision as Phoenix wish and hope to be with princess ... sometimes we have to sacrifice's to get something else in return.  We can't have both world my dear friends!  Don't be greedy ... Be simple, Be natural, Be free...

Thank you my princess, because of you mommy's n daddy's have took up lots of new challenges!  Thing happen for reason, be positive always!

Everyone is born free, be free, stay free... life goes on babe so ENJOY ya hoooooooooo

Count Down...

6 more days.. Phoenix will be travelling again and start her next task. 

hmmm tiring week but Phoenix enjoy it.  Thinking about the next task, Phoenix really hope that can completes all the assignments and project so that can graduates by next year.  Phoenix wish that this time round Tinkerbell can join Phoenix convocation... 10 yrs ago, Tinkerbell didn't make it... this time.. please do try k coz Phoenix wish you be there for her...remember 10 yrs ago convocation... before convocation.. super mom remind Phoenix to purchase 4 tickets.. 2 for Phoenix parents and 2 for Tinkerbell n Jiefu.  When the day reach, only Phoenix parents attenting.. that time the feeling feel a bit upset coz others all their family members is there to celebrate for them... Phoenix console herself ... Phoenix keep telling herself.. they might be really busy and can't make it so it's okay...

Phoenix.. jia you jia you!

Snake... wahahaha

Interesting morning, not waking up by my own :( Tinkerbell called me to check on her '2 inches' long snake.  6 something if Phoenix not wrong...haiz.. yesterday ord so tired.. so early in the morning Tinkerbell wakes me up just to check on snake???? Tinkerbell always very dramatic eh so Phoenix just say ya ya ah ah.. by the way.. Phoenix did really check whether the baby snake still there boh...  see see boh.. so Phoenix continue to have a nap a while. 

After a while... Tinkerbell reach home! asking Phoenix got see the snake or not... boh leh should be gone ord Phoenix guess.  Phoenix rush to get ready for training session today.  After Phoenix took the shower get change... helppppppppppppppppppppp this Tinkerbell shouting ! hulamak... lucky Phoenix got her pants on ord and yes... her bra.  Tinkerbell keep knocking on the door  - ah ma woi............................ snakeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee huh... siaow khi... Phoenix half naked man!!!! cham la this cha boh! got snake got snake.. feel funny and scared at the same times wakakakakakaka Tinkerbell always like tat eh hihihihihihiiiii she jumps on the bed.. Phoenix check with her where's the snake... she's born on year of snake k................. Tinkerbell said in the basin... what in the basin??? huh tis snake must be very keng la go basin find food wakakakakak...

Phoenix very fast close the door .. then Tinkerbell said - must close my room door la later the snake will go in... how ah.. she look at Phoenix.. walao eh asked Phoenix go and die man....Phoenix told her... I also scared  hor.. then Tinkerbell pass me the blanket.. use blanket if the snake attack wont be able to bite u!!! kns this Tinkerbell... emmm this time Phoenix look for something more solid.. thank god - Phoenix super mom did reserved pan wok in the room wahahahahah.. Phoenix carry the wok and blanket to check on the status... huh.. how to check?? what if the snake came out and bite me.. Tinkerbell - climb up to the cupboard there and check .. very kian la ask Phoenix go and check she hide in the room.... Phoenix always be the forefrontner.. so go la.. or else like Tinkerbell in the room ma c cham wahahahaha

Bring my weapon - blanket as bullet proof and wok as my snapper! hahahhaha climb up the cupboard.. boh leh.. Tinkerbell said check again.. cannt be its run again.. huh where to??? Tinkerbell panic again... jeng jeng Phoenix saw snake.. beside the newspaper.. huh.. fast fast Phoenix close the door and cover the door seal.. ma eh.. so 'BIG' eh snake.. as too early in the morning Phoenix didn't hear properly how big is the snake from Tinkerbell.. beh tahan this Tinkerbell .... everything ma shout.. make my heart pumping so darn fast.  Want to pengsan khi!

Hai, since the snake is so Big...Phoenix let Tinkerbell handle the rest.  Phoenix help her to call the neighbour, shout like siaow lan wahahahhahahaha.. Phoenix guess the rest .. member can read from her blog :P

Tinkerbell Tinkerbell.. be brave a bit la... beh c mah let u shout c khi k.. pity the snake Phoenix guess the snake must be shocked too wakakakakaka it's happy ending anyway, baby snake go back to nature and Tinkerbell happy happy with her fb again hihihihihi..

Last Mile...

Today manage to get those pending done.. huh.. finally!  Left one more week, what's next.. will be conducting training for 5 days, saturday got demo, sunday got friend visiting... monday, tuesday and wednesday should be reserved for rest and shopping yeee peee... feeling relieved!  It feels so good to get those planning done.. yeah yeah yeah.. happy happy happy dancing dancing dancing hee hee hee.. feeling really great... feeling like on cloud nine

haiz... after this, what's next???? Thinking of this - want to cry!  assignmentsssss and project awaiting for me!@#$%$%&^*#&$  don't want to do can or not??? NOoooooooooooooooo as ord paid and most important it's my DREAM.. so Phoenix jia you pa ..

Very tired day, want to have good rest so that tomorrow can do a good job :)

Happy Mother's Day!

A permanent full time job is being a Mother!  you can't tender resignation and there is no part-time post.  Mothers' a special person, who is there for her child through sacrifies, love and pain.  Giving out unconditional love, everlasting devotion, to hold her family together, through the storms of life.  To all the greatest mom on earth....today is your day.. Happy Mother's Day and have wonderful day!

Phoenix have great mom too.  Other then thank you.. still thank you to my super mom.  She's the best and only in my heart.  She may not be perfect but in my world she's everything.  When Phoenix down, she's there.  When Phoenix cry, she's there.  When Phoenix despair, she's there.  When Phoenix lost hope, she's there.  When Phoenix happy... she's there!  She'll always be there for Phoenix.  Thank you mom, you're the best!  I'll be patience and strong leading my life... don't worry! I will keep moving on no matter what.. keep praying for me... as long as I know you're there for me... I won't give up!

Today, Phoenix called her super mom at 7.45am... mom, happy mother's day.. I LOVE U!  thank you for everything!  This is first time Phoenix says all those words!  All this while, Phoenix will just send cards to her.  This time round, Phoenix call as she don't want to miss any chance.. thanks them while they are still 'here' with us..

Brextin Darling..may you rest in Peace

Today read Phoenix email and knowing that little Brextin in god's hand now... Phoenix tears just can't stop flowing.. knowing the support group is the best thing for Phoenix as that's the place where Phoenix get all the update and information needed. 

Whenever, we get update on the good news.. we all will congrates each other, query - we support each other, lost - we will find each other, feeling down - we motivate each other... We are all from different part of the world.. without prejudice we have become 'Family'. 

Knowing one of the family member gone now, it's indeed heart breaking and lost. 

*I never thought I would be typing this to this group - our son has been a true fighter through everything - however his life will continue as he walks in heaven's arms. *

Little B was born on mothers day almost three years ago - and his journey began when he was only two months old - they (parents) have struggled with seizures and vomiting almost since day one.

They were scheduled for a second opinion EEG and something occurred that they were not expecting - his seizures began to increase - and by Thursday he was having about 12 a day - as our son had seizures he would often vomit - and because his tiny system was backed up (not able to have a bowel movement) - his stomach wasn't emptying as it should - and so when he had seizures - the food kept coming up and it eventually entered into his lungs - which caused him to have pneumonia - they pumped his chest for over one hour - and eventually gave up.

The parents at a total lost - never thought they would be laying their youngest son to rest.

Little B looked fantastic- never would have thought - that he would only be around for one more day.

'I tried therapy after therapy with our son - and I now know that he is finally walking, running, and talking up a storm up in heaven with his Great Grandpa and Uncle.'

We were blessed to have known such a wonderful boy - he had a contagious smile and a heart of gold.

Reading the last sentence of little Brextin parents -'Peace be with all of you as you continue to travel along your child's journey. I am so at peace knowing our son is no longer having seizures, vomiting, or having any type of pain.'

Goodbye little Brextin...please be free and enjoy your day in heaven's my dear!

with lots of luv & hug

My Naruto

Naruto, Naruto hahahaha this little guy is innocent, strong headed and chicky.  Yesterday, Phoenix and Naruto having dinner together. 

Before dinner, Phoenix was asked to pick up Naruto from his tuition centre.  Naruto mom's keep remind Phoenix - remember to pick up my darling ah.. at 4.30pm Phoenix have to rush to the centre to pick Naruto as worried later Naruto run khi.. reach there... eh how come no one yet... it's too early!  wait again for 10 mins... all the kids came down from centre.  Phoenix keep looking, how come Naruto not down yet.. Naruto might be missing Phoenix car.. so Phoenix came down and wait... eh... how come still no shadow of Naruto.. Phoenix check with some of the kids there... did you all saw Naruto ma... and gave them Naruto real name.. kids look at me.. I guess hor he's being asked to stay back..... huh!!! worried... Phoenix worried that Naruto will go mad... as Naruto don't like to be controlled. 

Phoenix went up to the centre.. someone open the gate for Phoenix and smile... check with the guy whether my Naruto there or not.. he said neh... Phoenix peep a bit, cham lor inside Phoenix heart... ask Naruto standing there to read????? Phoenix look for the headmistress... and try to peep inside the classroom again.. thank god, there's 2 more cartoons standing also wahhahahhahaha.. at least my Naruto feels better for sure kakakakkakaa... get update from the headmistress and shared with headmistress on how to handle my Naruto.. thank you headmistress for being patience with him and didn't make Naruto feel bad heeheeheee.. Naruto.. Naruto.. the headmistress told Phoenix that have to wait for Naruto at least 20 - 30 mins.. Phoenix okay with it but told the headmistress that must told Naruto that he stayed back just for revision not punishment hehehehehehe... Phoenix wait again.. 45 mins.. want to Zzzzzz

Naruto came down with smilling face... hahahaha believed the headmistress must be praising him a bit that's make him better or else... sure tears over his face.  Naruto keep explain to Phoenix why he's being asking to stay back.. Phoenix respond to Naruto.. it's okay my dear, your headmistress said you're very good.... follow instruction so don't worry k.. coz ord paid money for the tuition nevermind la stay back a bit to do revision.. hehehehehe.. Naruto feels better now he smile at Phoenix.. ya hor ord pay nevermind la wakakakaka kids kids..

At dinner, Naruto chat with Phoenix on baby conditions.  Naruto told me that he overheard conversation from grandma and Naruto mom hahahaha.. kids never lies! Naruto said how if baby like that.. with smile, Phoenix respond to Naruto - it's okay, she will be alrite don't worry.  Naruto told Phoenix, better let baby go HOME as here only go pasar nia wakakakakaka can't learn much.... with this sentence from Naruto it's really awake Phoenix further and confirmed Phoenix decision.. It's time to go school baobei. 

Naruto ordered his favorite - fish salad.  He finish it!  Love my Naruto, be good and well too.  Nothing is impossible for willing heart Naruto, put more effort and you can do it!

Hair Cut!!

After more then a year having curl hair, Phoenix decided to change hair style.  Darn... didn't realises that S'wak saloon cost a boom this time.  So happy Phoenix with her gal partner go to the saloon.  Inside the car, Phoenix check with MC whether this saloon expensive or not and whether the hair stylist good or not.  MC responded that she have done the research and everyone said that this is the best saloon in town.  hmmm.. since that's the case.. okay la we go as we both hate our CURL!

Excited when we reach the saloon.. we chat with the hairstylist bla bla bla.. everyone was so enjoy. 

Done the hair... jeng jeng jeng.. go counter to pay.. x00.00 wahsen.... eyes want to drop khi! baby one month supply man... OMG!!! when did standard of s'wak being so high up khi!!! we look at each other... hahahahaha ord cut kon har mi leh haiz.... learn a lesson, must check price before do the cut!

Suppose to go back there and do Phoenix hair colour... no no no... Phoenix will just go to any shop and buy the dye and do herself. 

Phoenix quite happy with her hair cut... MC wahahahaha so IN 'purple' colour hair style wakakakakakaka.. lucky Phoenix didn't manage to do the colour as time consent! This few days, MC have being so troubled with her hair colour heheehehe... enjoy it babe! kakakaka

This year no more hair cut or anything to do with Phoenix hair coz... all done for a year :(

Little Genie

Coming back to hometown is a real adventure. 

Today, Phoenix met one little frenz.  She is 11 yrs old.  Little genie Phoenix named her.  She is on wheelchair why.. Phoenix didn't ask.  Phoenix like to hang around at this ICE shop at town.  Whenever Phoenix fire is on the heat... that is the place where Phoenix will be... enjoying the cool and sweet of the ice really cools Phoenix down. 

Before that, Phoenix saw little genie 2 times - in the shop ofcoz.  Very first time, she's shy!  This time round don't know what make little genie make the move.  Little genie came to Phoenix and chat.  Maybe coz Phoenix took out her mini netbook hihihihi.. as little genie likes to online.  So she came near Phoenix and says.. your laptop very nice la so cute hahaha... Phoenix then asked little genie - yours one must very big rite... Little genie with proud look - yah! hee hee hee.. kids are so innocent :)

Phoenix asked little genie why she didn't go to school today... with shy look little genie respond... 'stomach ache'.  hmmm.. then she continue.. I don't like school! Looking at her patiencely and softly, Phoenix respond to little genie - it's okay as long as you are happy that's more important k.. this time little genie smile back at Phoenix.. yah.. then little genie continue.. I got facebook u know?? hahaha so cute this gal.  Phoenix respond to little genie, oh.. now kids all enjoy fb la.. u so smart girl.. what is your name.. so that I can add u... little genie respond.. my name is emily..wah what a sweet name :) this time little genie smile broodly.. thank you.. and Phoenix also introduce herself to little genie.  They had a good chat. 

Phoenix like to chat with little genie and they keep laughing.  Suddenly little genie ask Phoenix - why u so happy ah.. always laugh hahahhaha.. Phoenix respond to little genie, happy or not we still need to move on with our life.. so why don't we be happy rite.. little genie smile and nodding her head.. yah Phoenix I agree Little Genie respond. 

Little Genie, you must be brave and have courage to move on k... jia you jia you.. life is full of adventure, enjoy every second of our life and keep learning from everyone.  After chatting with little genie, make Phoenix refresh and energetic.  This little gal is so brave... living her life patiencely and trust she must have her frustration on her shortages.. however, she's learning from everyone too.. remember that one of her stuff drop on the floor.. Phoenix taught of picking up for her.. at very fast pace.. little genie bend down and pick it up... if she can do it.. why can't we.. for those that born well.. be wise and lead your life well.  Treasure what you have as some people just can't have it.. as it's born to be!!

Little genie - my little frenz.. Phoenix will keep you in her prayers.. be happy always!  Phoenix will try to drop by whenever she can

Luv you little genie!

What the fishhhhhh

Today, early in the morning  Phoenix remembered that something important not being done.  So after asking Phoenix supervisor.. quickly Phoenix change and rush to the H.  Who want to visit H if feeling well and healthy? 

Being early bird there Phoenix get the chance to see some of the scenario so hope to share with members.

First scenario - one pair of old ladies can't speak malay or english only able to commute in their language go to reception counter.  Without looking at the ladies, N show 'black face' and respond ya ya... just put your card in the 'lobang' in malay.  The old ladies confuse look... and respond in their language, the other N ask us to come over and pass this letter to you... then the N respond again.. just put in the 'lobang' neh.. got 8 o'clock, 8.30 and so on... with frustration look this time.. the old ladies getting very agitated this time... just put the ticket at the counter in front of the N.  N later also accepted this letter. 
* why can't N just accept the letter at the first place to reduce all the hassle? can't she behave better? they're old ladies and should be treated with respect.  And another advice for this N, if not willing to serve people why join servicing line?  Better stay at home and relax.  Remember that you are getting pay from taxpayer so serve them as they are your BOSS.  Without them, you're out of JOB!!!

Second scenario - Phoenix turn this time.... seeing the N reading the letter that being submitted for a while, Phoenix wait patiently.  After N go through the letter, she call out the name mentioned on the letter and Phoenix sit down.  First question from N - what is the problem? Phoenix respond politely - this is refer letter -for my gal from Johor to Sibu and my gal was bla bla bla (everything is written on the letter anyway) . Then N respond - How come no date and no chop and from what hospital? Phoenix look at the letter a while - pointed at the date to N, this is the date.. N respond - when is the letter being written? Pointed at the date on the letter and smile back at N - N this is the date right! Phoenix respond .. yah this is the date this letter was written.  Other then the H, Phoenix don't think anyone can have this letter head rite? why there is no chop - Phoenix also don't know that this letter chop ..... the letter thing N got nothing to respond.. N asked another question, where's the gal H card? eh.. this time Phoenix asked N back, the other H told me that all the record is in the system, and you all can just go in the system and will be able to get all the details... then N start to press on her keyboard .. yah we got her name here.. where is your H card the pink colour one!!!cb eh.. tis time Phoenix really on fire ord....and told N -  my main purpose here is to get the medicine, how should I go about it.  N respond, you can just go to polyclinic.  Phoenix asked do they have this.... medicine?  N respond - I don't know, you go there first and see which H they'll refer you again.... this time Phoenix just walk off. 
* what the fffffffffffffffffffffffffff darn bloody fool.  should really fired this kind of bad attitude service people, why should we pay for them if they don't know how to serve.  Already sick still need to please them.. this is all bad applesss.... keep them just to make our servicing line like darn yucky...

Reach polyclinic
First intention just want to get information how to get the medicine - reach 'kaunter pertanyaan' morning sir, I got refer letter from Johor and want to get the medicine how to go about it?  the 'sir' - ambil no. wahsen.. this time Phoenix stunt... ambil no?  saya cuma nak tanya macam mana process dia sebab kita nak balik tempat lain... 'sir' yalah ambil no.............. this cb gong eh sir .. make me want to slap him.  If ambil no. put your counter as NO. Counter!!!! don't put it 'kaunter pertanyaan'... people don't even ask question you keep asking people to take no. if not willing to respond.. don't sit there!!! what the hack that our H management is doing. getting all the monkeys and donkeys to work there.. make the patient sick worsen and the best.. they're darn proud of their ATTITUDE!!!!

Phoenix very dissapointed of their GOODDDDD RESPOND! and came to Phoenix supervisor.  Supervisor asked Phoenix to try another counter - Pharmacy, thank god .. the lady (about 50-60 of age) respond with patience and smile.  Phoenix show her the refer letter and asked about the medicine available, with nice tone the lady said we have the medicine here you just have to pass the letter to the counter they'll know how to process.  As there is a lot of patient now, please come in afternoon better then she smile back at Phoenix.  Really thank god there's ONE that do her job well. 

Please Please Please, no one want to visit H if feeling well... so all the service people in this line, serve your patience with warm heart as one day you'll be patience too.. will you be happy should you get this kind of respond?  or if your related person is sick and being serve in this kind of matter.. how will you fell?  Phoenix don't know, maybe for them it's norm .. we keep talking about Quality... is this the Quality that we are talking about??? then... we should look into our future plan again.... no more increament.... got increament the service also f same so why should we pay high????  What KIP are we talking about.. with this kind of grad... then the KIP should be reviewed...

My Little Princess

Seeing her growing each day is heart warming.  Taking care of her is life long commitment.  A lot of people have being giving lots of suggestion.. Phoenix know they care - thank you

My little princess.. keep growing each day! jia you jia you... mommy will bring you back to our HOME.  Sorry for getting grandma n grandpa to take care of you for so long as mommy n daddy need to take care something important in our life that is money.... For others it might not be that important.. but for us.. we can't live without it.. why! remember Phoenix did shared this topic with my master.  My little princess need that to survive.. as parents we always hope to provide them the best.  It apply same to us.... we work very hard just hope to provide our little princess the best.  Baobei, daddy n mommy always praying that you be healthy.

Lately, litle princess have being put on new vitamins.. wah .. the vita seems to work well.  Looking at little princess improvement, make Phoenix decided to bring her back to school.  Phoenix always make plan based on little princess conditions so baobei you must be strong .... then mommy will be strong too.. we must work hard hand in hand together.  Nothing impossible for willing heart so... don't give up coz mommy never give up any hope... you will be alrite!

Happy B'day Tinkerbell..

Last few days Phoenix and Tinkerbell have an arguement.. here really want to scold Tinkerbell... 'silly' Honestly a lot of times the thing that Tinkerbell does really 'out of space' cant imaginable wahahahaha .. Tinkerbell must be thinking that Phoenix is still angry with her... actually Phoenix got better thing to do.. really!  for Phoenix, anything to do with her family member she just listen.  As life is so unpredictable so why bother that much.. most important is living with patience and joy. 

5th May is Tinkerbell b'day, do hope she's growing more 'mature' and happy.  Phoenix will be back to her nest soon so hope Tinkerbell can really really grown up now.  Tinkerbell, Tinkerbell... she's the darling of her family....hope she knows    Tinkerbell always lost her direction.. fly here not,  fly there also not.. a lot of times, we need to find our own direction.  No one able to guide us now.. as we all grown up.  Need to learn how to be independent.. others can only share with us points, decision is still on our own.  Anyway, say much to her also pointless as she's the fairies wakakakakaka... Tinkerbell should know what is best for her.. please do not lost your direction again as...... it really make us worries!  sprink la.. sprink your dust.. for now.. sprink at yourself as you need a blast on your big day wahahahahaha..

Happy b'day dajie, Phoenix know deep in her heart that you love her dearly.. no worries.. gambateh together!!

Tired... why people just can't keep their promises.. fed up, upset, dissapointed............ speechless.  It's being very tiring week, just 2 more weeks so do hold on.  Will go back own Home soon - gambatei nei

Don't look back! keep moving as there's reason for everything that happen.  Phoenix have being talking to herself a lot these few days.  Nothing special happen, just Tired... still Tired!  No time to entertain all the dramas as got better thing to do. 

Going to bring her precious back Home with Phoenix.  Do hope she can start her school days soon and catch up with her peers.  Human being is indeed very unique creature... back to hometown have being a very interesting journey for Phoenix.  Thing have not being what Phoenix taught, anyway it's okay coz everything that happen gave Phoenix a learning lesson. 

Will get everything that pending done within next 2 weeks so that Phoenix can cut down her travelling.  Being at own place is still the best.  Once back HOME, there's few task need to complete... assignment and project need to be done and submit.. do hope to get graduated by next year ... few more months to go.. September got fair need to attend so.. got to prepare for that as well ..huh lots of thing to do.. jia you jia you Phoenix.. don't stop keep moving! yeee haaaa

Gonna say goodbye to the rest very soon.. so take care tho'

yee peee.. finally, we will be back HOME!

unbelieveable!!!

Sometimes Phoenix just can't understand why people is so darn bloody 'smart'.  Everything people said change it to something else.  If oneself still can't understand their own problem .. then what is that rite to talk about others.  The best part is keep blaiming others!!!! what the 'f'........... make Phoenix darn angry is still thinking they're darn rite.... really idiot!! what is got to do with with people wisdom and genious... do they know that whenever you point finger at people.. there's 3 others fingers pointing at your ownself????

Think first before announce to the whole world coz you're really making yourself like .............. no words to decribe or else will keep saying this and that haiz.. some people is indeed unbelieveable

Anyway, Phoenix learned! thank you... this time they're going to get a big one from Phoenix.. Phoenix very good in keep silent so don't worry

In Phoenix life, she have 2 very dear sisters and 1 brother- named Tinkerbell, Rain & Dragonball.

Rain, left 13 years ago.  Bring all the pain, left great memories.  Rain, you will always be remembered and missed.

Tinkerbell... cute, innocent hmmmm can't describe much hahahahaha for Phoenix, Tinkerbell is very true to her life.  Never thinking that much just enjoy it.  Sometimes, Tinkerbell can be really funny and sometimes she can be really annoyed wakakakakaka.. anyway, Phoenix loves to chat, share and argue with Tinkerbell cause that is what we call 'sisterhood'. 

Among the sisters, Phoenix understoond that she is the most difficult to handle hahahhahaha.. maybe cause of the path that Phoenix went through, Phoenix more proctective, careful and detailed in everything she does.  In another way, Tinkerbell is opposites Phoenix characters.  There is good of the mixture Phoenix guess.  However, when comes to discuss important issue... it is indeed a problem hahahahahha cause Tinkerbell will have her own way of saying haiz...and a lot of times... can't really understand Tinkerbell decision.. maybe Tinkerbell just have to sprink her dust everything will be solved wahahahahaha.. how naive this thinking can be ... it is good that someone in the family still living in her youth and enjoy.  Indeed a treasure hehehehehe.. Phoenix shared a lot of her life with Tinkerbell, a listening ears is the best medicine - Thank you Tinkerbell.  It means a lot to Phoenix.

Tinkerbell have start writing blog... since started, Tinkerbell have being asking Phoenix for comments and thoughts... hehehehe honestly, it is quite difficult for Phoenix to understand as all in Chinese hmmmm can only blaimed that Phoenix didn't study chinese well in school.  However, Phoenix did tried her best to understand the writing - use translation hihhihii.. another problem as direct translation will deviate the main meaning so.. can only guess & guess and still guess not too bad yah..Want to tell Tinkerbell, I do read your blog :) luvs u  Tinkerbell have being very proud and happy with her blog hahahaha.. well done & good job! At least now Tinkerbell got new task, don't just flying around and wonder yah.. keep it up, keep writing good article to share.

Hmmmm talk about Dragonball, very self centered boy.   Finally Dragonball have grown up.  On 12 April 2010, Dragonball gave Phoenix one Red Packet.... it's the heart that matters :) Thank You, Dragonball - jia you jia you... you can do it! Sorry for being very very firmed with you.  Do really hope one day, you can truely understand why Phoenix do so.  From bottom of Phoenix heart - Dragonball, you must live healthy and well.  Be confidence and venture more in your life.  Phoenix kept the Red Packet well and safe for now.. Dragonball, when your child start their first job - Phoenix will pass it down to them.  May they be blessed with all the lucks.  How Phoenix wish the day comes true... may blessed Phoenix long life huhuhu

Wish you all well and happy.. in regardless where you all will be you are always in my mind!  please do live well and be happy always.

Ah Dey called Phoenix today.  Since starting writing on blog, Phoenix have being asking Ah Dey to read.  WHY?  Phoenix always find it very difficult to 'chat' with Ah Dey..... anything that he don't want to listen, he will just shut his ears off or eyes - sleeping.  Ah Dey really don't care... hmmmm how to let Ah Dey 'listen' to Phoenix?  Thanks to blog and first, thanks to my sifu J :)

Can understand whenever, Ah Dey got chance to take a nap he'll.  Ah Dey tired ... Phoenix understand from bottom of her heart.... Ah Dey, Phoenix really hope you can open up her blog once a day to get Ah Dey updates.

Chat over the MSN today, again Phoenix asked Ah Dey - 'did you visit my blog?'  Easily Ah Dey respond.. 'I need to eat first just reach home.'  Phoenix keep asking over the chat - 'please visit my blog.... since you don't want to hear me talking, at least you can read over my blog what is going on here.  You free you read, not free it's okay' Deep inside Phoenix heart she really hope Ah Dey read.

After a while, Ah Dey respond - 'I did k'... that time, tears flow down Phoenix cheek... thankyou Ah Dey for reading.  Other's might don't understand all the up's and down's they go through together... jia you jia you.    Phoenix and Ah Dey have being cheering for each other all this while.  Trust they will keep cheering for each other till the end.  'Nam Myo-ho Renge Kyo'

I AM THE CHILD

This Poem touches Phoenix deeply, would like to share with member.

I am the child who cannot talk.

You often pity me, I see it in your eyes. You wonder how much I am aware of -- I see that as well. I am aware of much -- whether you are happy or sad or fearful, patient or impatient, full of love and desire, or if you are just doing your duty by me. I marvel at your frustration, knowing mine to be far greater, for I cannot express myself or my needs as you do. 

You cannot conceive my isolation, so complete it is at times. I do not gift you with clever conversation, cute remarks to be laughed over and repeated. I do not give you answers to your everyday questions, responses over my well-being, sharing my needs, or comments about the world about me. I do not give you rewards as defined by the world's standards -- great strides in development that you can credit yourself; I do not give you understanding as you know it. 

What I give you is so much more valuable -- I give you instead opportunities. Opportunities to discover the depth of your character, not mine; the depth of your love, your commitment, your patience, your abilities; the opportunity to explore your spirit more deeply than you imagined possible.

I drive you further than you would ever go on your own, working harder, seeking answers to your many questions with no answers. I am the child who cannot talk.

I am the child who cannot walk.
The world seems to pass me by. You see the longing in my eyes to get out of this chair, to run and play like other children. There is much you take for granted. I want the toys on the shelf, I need to go to the bathroom, oh I've dropped my fork again. I am dependant on you in these ways.

My gift to you is to make you more aware of your great fortune, your healthy back and legs, your ability to do for yourself. Sometimes people appear not to notice me; I always notice them. I feel not so much envy as desire, desire to stand upright, to put one foot in front of the other, to be independent. I give you awareness. I am the child who cannot walk.

I am the child who is mentally impaired.
I don't learn easily, if you judge me by the world's measuring stick, what I do know is infinite joy in simple things. I am not burdened as you are with the strife and conflicts of a more complicated life. My gift to you is to grant you the freedom to enjoy things as a child, to teach you how much your arms around me mean, to give you love. I give you the gift of simplicity. I am the child who is mentally impaired.

I am the disabled child. I am your teacher. If you allow me, I will teach you what is really important in life. I will give you and teach you unconditional love. I gift you with my innocent trust, my dependency upon you. I teach you about how precious this life is and about not taking things for granted. I teach you about forgetting your own needs and desires and dreams. I teach you giving. Most of all I teach you hope and faith. I am the disabled child.

- Author Unknown -

p.s. Loves your child.  They are gift from Heaven!  Baobei, mommy's luvs you.

Working Day

After 2 days of resting, Phoenix start her engine again.  How Phoenix wish that she have more then a pair of hand.  Not enough hand to do all the planned schedule. 

Early morning, Phoenix get herself ready to collect the 'thing' that suppose to be in her office last few months ago... another long story for this 'thing' that mentioned.. anyway, she manage to get it and send the stuff safely to her office with full of sweat accompany her. 

Phoenix really do not like people that don't keep promises.  Make her round, round and round so troublesome.  Why can't people just keep their promises and get the thing done.  c cai cham this kind of people.  Do they realises that time is precious.  Time is money so do not waste time.

Anyway, get the rest of 40% of planning done this week.  Still got few days to go.  This week is also travelling week.  Hmmmm.. treat is as holiday then it won't be boring/tiring :)

Talk about being boss, very nice and wide scope.  Dealing with different country, state, teritory and business partner is another challenging task.  Phoenix have being travelling around places before Phoenix venture own business. 

One country that's memorable to her is VIETNAM .. .huh...this is a country where Phoenix really Phobia wakakakakaka.. thinking of their food.. OMG want to CRY ... yah crying... still remember one incident when one of her big boss (KT) bring her to eat... KT said to Phoenix, 'if you come to vietnam don't taste their local food ah, you can't tell people you have being here'.. Phoenix look at KT for a while.. okayla buy his idea.  They get their local staff to bring them around and taste the local food.  First dish, so call local popiah... gosh.. scarry dish.  As Phoenix don't eat that much vege so boh pian la since already there... try also.  First bite like in HEAVEN wahahahahaha.... Phoenix looked at KT and inside her heart cursing him non-stop ! @ #=9^$&*;* this kind of food, who can eat gosh... deep down Phoenix heart she is really chanting hard.  The taste ah.. how to describe, like bit the curry leaves, for those that like herbs Phoenix guess it's not an issue but for those that don't or not tasting anything like that.. hmmmm better do not put the leaves on the rice paper (popiah skin) As Phoenix was at other's country, as respect.. c c have to swallow.  Korlian! 

The best part is, KT didn't call only one dish.. he called 3 dishes... c beh gao.  Second dish, Raw beef with 'fur' (look like kua tiao).  KT seems to be really expert in local food, as he's being to Vietnam more times then Phoenix, he starts to taste first, jeng jeng jeng... KT face like hmmmm SHOCK wakakakakakaka... want to vomit hahahahahaha it's real RAW k. Can't understand that dish as well.  Phoenix just try a bit as courtesy.  Shake her head, why la people like to make ownself suffered wakakakaka... it's adventure in another words.

3rd dish, hmmm.. only 'fur' soup.  Not bad - honestly.  Clear soup :) thank god! at least one local food that can be eaten.

Dinner, as they have experience the local food on noon, they tried sea food this time.  Trust should be culture different as the way they prepare their cooking is so much different then ours here.  Everything in Vietnam, Phoenix mean food will be dipped in 'fish source'.  They ordered, oyster, BBQ crab, fish and... can't remember others.  Oyster - not too bad.  Fish - okay. BBQ Crab - this one is best wakakakakaka... the restaurant didn't really clean the crab just put the live crab and grilled on the pan ....  hmmmmm.. when the crab being served we get KT to taste first as he's the boss ma ;P Phoenix remember very clearly KT said, 'I don't eat crab that often eh' wakakakakkakakaka... you know why he says that... coz he felt that the crab is tooooo clean to eat... Phoenix looked at KT a while, hmmmmm got the message hihihihihi.. poor local staff, have to finish the food and the staff told me, next time don't order that much already hahahahhahaha... he eat till darn full.

Actually hor, should we in our own country - Malaysia, KT does eat Crab! hahahahaha..

So another thing to learn, we can try, but not everything must try ;P 

It's a great experience being with great bosses and colleagues, Phoenix learned so much from this amazing & wonderful team!  May they be blessed with good health and wealth, should there be any chance - we might be working partner in future :) Luv them lots

Phoenix got one very very very close friend name 'W' whom really like to sleep.  Whenever there is free time W will find place to close eyes and take a nap.  It's not a crime to sleep for sure.  However, Phoenix always have a thought that why don't find a better thing to do other then sleeping.

Definitely understand that other then work whenever there is free or rest day, W will try his best to sleep.  Honestly Phoenix found that W have being overslept and missed a lot of adventure around W.  Example: what have being happen while W sleep? News? Family? Always because of 'sleeping' topic, Phoenix and W have small arguement.  Coz Phoenix thinking that W should learn and adventure more thing while we are still healthy while W think that should rest and relax while we can... Phoenix remember what 'Thinkerbell' said 'No right, No wrong'!

Haiz.. this have being really interesting topic to write this time hahahaha.. coz while writing, Phoenix have being sighing uncontrolled.  Didn't realises that because of this topic it cause her to crack her brain ;P.

Talk about W.. hmmmm very interesting person.  Born in April - Aries strong headed baby hihihihi.. bad temper, undefeatable, imaginative and ci ai bin wakakakakaka.... actually, W is very loving person other then what mentioned.  Towards family, W very helpless most of the time.  Being the eldest in family, W have being pampered most of life.  Everyone loves Wso much, most of the thing don't need him to worry and do ofcoz other then W main work.  Lately, Phoenix have make a decision to let W walk by owned.  So far W done so well - good job!  Phoenix always proud of W.

From nothing to what W achieve today, personally W is doing really really well.  Without good education background, certification to support him.  W have work really hard start from rank and file till today to management level so... being in the corporate management team, W - you are really doing great!  so do not feel inferior, as long as you have done your best and put all your effort to get the thing done is good enough.  Remember, we can't pleased everyone!

13th February 2010 - a date where W lost someone close dearly.  He's being crying silently.  Thinking why thing happen that way.  Looking at W that time Phoenix realises that how much they have being missing good times together.  A lot of times, we forgot about the goods of the person.  We can only remember all the bad thing that happen.  Is this how 'above' creates us.. only remember the bad other then good??

After the incident, Phoenix took a chance to talk to their family member to stay together and loves each other more.  Thing seems not last long... haiz... No right, No wrong!  everyone have their right to choose the way of life they want to live.  As long as they were happy, it should be a thing to celebrate as well. 

For Phoenix, as long as W is well - nothing else matter.  Phoenix hope and wish that W always x2 remember that we loves him.  Baby Phoenix loves you too.  But... don't sleep too much cause you have miss out so much of our programme.

Time flies treasure every second, minutes & hours cause once you miss it... it won't be able to redo one more times... we only lives once!

Some say love it is a river, that drowns the tender reed, Some say love it is a razor, that leaves your soul to bleed, Some say love it is a hunger, an ednless aching need. I say love it is a flower, and you it's only seed.

It's the heart afraid of breaking, that never learns to dance, It's the dream afraid of waking, that never takes the chance. It's the one who won't be taken, who can not seems to give, and the soul afraid of dyin', that never learns to live.

When the night has been too lonely, and the road has been too long.  And you think that love is only, for the lucky and the strong.  Just remember in the winter, far beneath the bitter snow, Lies the seed that with the sun's love. In the spring becomes a rose.

Just remember in the winter, far beneath the bitter snow, Lies the seed that with the sun's love, in the spring becomes a rose.

Some say love it is a river, that drowns the tender reed. Some say love it is a razor, that leaves your soul to bleed. Some say love it it a hunger, an endless aching need.  I say love it is a flower, and you it's only seed.
When the night has been too lonely, and the road has been too long.  And you think that love is only for you the lucky and the strong.

Just remeber in the winter, far beneath the bitter snow, Lies te seed that with the sun's love, in the spring becomes a rose. Just remember in the winter far beneath the bitter snow, Lies the seed that with the sun's love, in the spring becomes a rose....

Drop of Rain

This morning Phoenix read one of the article about the 'Rain'.  It touches Phoenix heart deeply.  Phoenix shed tears again. 

Rain - are you well there?
Rain - do you feel cool there?
Rain - anyone playing with you there?
Rain - do you know we miss you dearly?

Rain... it will go on and on questioning how Rain is doing.  A lot of times, try to numb ownself to do lots of thing not to think about Rain leaving.  Rain comes and go.  After Rain there is Rainbow.  Isn't it beautiful?  Rain leave a better sky for everyone, colourful rainbow for everyone to joy coz only after Rain, we will be able to see 7 beautiful colours above.  Haze will faded, sky turns blue.. wah, Rain - you are amazing, we loves you.  You are always in my mind.  Be free and stay free just like Rain comes when you want to visit us, go when you want to play.

Time flies, it's being more then 12 years nearly 13 years that Rain leaves us.  Phoenix can never forgot the day as it was her b'day that Rain leave this cruel world.  It also marked 13 years that Phoenix didn't really celebrate b'day as it reminds her the painful day.  Why Phoenix says it's cruel world... understand the culprit that hit Rain out of law - what the fxxx.  Sometimes it really make her think what Law are we talking about haiz..life is so priceless but......  Is that it???? Yah, if keep asking 'Question' trust no one able to respond too. 

People always say.. LET GO!  is that simple... Not easy as he/she is your loves one.  It's being such a long time since Rain leave us.  A lot of times really have a thoughts - let it go... it will takes more times Phoenix guess.

Phoenix will keep writing about Rain unless Phoenix want to stop.. since she is gone.  That is all Phoenix want to share for now.

Can understand the other family that lost their famiy member... do loves those close to you coz, we won't be able to get those moment anymore.  Clock is tickling away, ask yourself what have you done for your loves one, stop complaining ACTION!!

No one is perfect however, we can learn to be better everyday ! gambateh nei

Aunt LUN Visit

Make a visit today to Aunt LUN, complaining about one of her colleague that didn't know how to be pro. and most important is public relations skill and the end results is hurting her :) I honestly felt that human being is really tough to understand.  Thing that might be OK for us might not be OK for others. 

They said human being is smart creature. hmmm is that true?  Being selfish is also consider smart!! Not able to consider others feeling - consider smart!  Too much shortage of characters that make me question lots on this living creature.  Why can't this 'smart' creature living harmony together?  Why do we need to differentiate the colour, religions, language and so on.  Trust the 'above' didn't create this for us to trouble.  It only created by this living creature.  AH.. now I realises why they are smart.  Coz they created their own culture, own character, own signage.  Apart from colours, personally - there is nothing different of all.

Can understand that maybe the environment is different which might create different living standard.  However, it shouldn't be the excuses why we can't live together harmony.  Is that really that difficult to live together and understand each other?  We should teach our kid, how to love each other and human revolutions instead of teaching them how to be so realistic in material things.  We came to this world naked, leaving with nothing so human... please do not harm each other or else what is different between us and beast. 

Do support family harmony, education & WORLD PEACE!

MOSQUITOSssss

Hate mosquitos.. darn many mosquitos at holiday's home.  Since Phoenix's back to the holiday house, this little creatures have being messing around with her.  Cant stand it, today Phoenix do one very hmmmm decision hehehe.. kill them wakakakaka.. so early in the morning, Phoenix get ready.  Take her shower, get her hair done and drive all the way to town just get the weapon - RIDSERT hehehehe

Can u imagine, everywhere u go there is this small alien flying here and there.. huh.. really can't stand them.  Very first day, Phoenix still treat it like exercise keep smapping at M.  However, thing getting out of control.. M getting more of its' family member join in battle.  Cant stand them, attack here and there.  Maybe they have stave for too long already.  Now finally got blood for them to suck.. ceh.. little vampire Phoenix call them. Yah, little vampire!!

wahahahahaha.. manage to get the weapon back.  It's time to start battle with this little vampire. 

First in order to win this battle, must keep looking and walk like a wind so that they won't be aware you are there.

Second, get ready the weapon (Ridsect) hehehehe... then last sprayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy  just in a while, this little vampire will faint

Last last, as most of them hide in the toilet Phoenix flush some of them in the paip and some to the drain. 

Yahooooo Phoenix won the battle.  Wonder tomorrow they will bring more member or not, she is not afraid coz she bought 2 bottles of RIDSECT wakakakaka... poor vampire!  Sometimes life is really unpredictable, have to choose either one.  In this situation, either you choose to be bite by them or you got to Destroy them.  Phoenix choose to destroy them coz.. she luvs herself more.  Most important is Phoenix afraid of DENGGI. 

So frenz, make sure you clean your house.  Do not keep them as they are not PET.

Rest Day

Finally today can really have a good rest. It is being a while since starting up own business... sometimes really thinking whether it is good decision or not. Too much thing to consider.

Don't do... problem!! Do also problem! anyway already started the main thinking now can only do it well and best to her ability. yay.. Phoenix jia you jia you

Life is like bed of roses.. but roses got thorn also so, in order to enjoy the beauty of the roses there is path and adventure that need to be done. Is this what people call LIFE!.. hmmmm what ever!

After Phoenix wishing her hubby b'day wishes yesterday, straight away go to sleep to have good and sound sleep. TIRED! yeap... really tired.. lot's of thing to do the last week but it is worth of resting. At least 60% of the planned schedule is done so far. Got to have good rest in order to have more energy to move on and continue.

Next Week thing to do:

Mother's day is around corner.. got new promo in the paip-line. Got to work hard to get this done well. Mother's day is a day everyone should say THANK YOU to the greatest women in the FAMILY. Give the the best gift possible... LOVE.

Travelling is also in planning. Can Phoenix not to travel? NO. Phoenix need to fly high and spread the wing. So... can only keep flying and ensure Phoenix is living. Do really hope that Phoenix is really like what the old times saying, flying high and living long..want to live long??? Don't think for now at least she's still speading her wing for now :)

Meeting .. hmmm when can Phoenix can really excape from having meeting. Sometimes she really think that it is wasting of time IF there is no Important Subject to talk about. Meeting, meeting, meeting

Training... Phoenix favoriate section. As this is place where Phoenix able to share with those that intested to learn and keep learning. Sharing is important as Phoenix trust in TEAM WORK. One person can do well.. more person can do better. Should a team able to work together and share the burden it is always a success for the organization. It apply same in family or places where's human living.

New Product study is also in schedule.. argh... this also means investment needed. Phoenix guess really have to print money instead of work hard to get money haahahahahha.. what a thinking!! Phoenix always laugh her own thinking about it coz sometimes it's really troublesome thinking on this part. Expansion definitely needed but.... MONEY always needed or else how to expand hmmmm maybe should.... master J should know what Phoenix thinking kakakaka !! It is good that Phoenix still able to laugh thinking those that not logic her own hehehehe.. come back to the very first question, whether is right or not starting up own business.... jeng jeng jeng.. answer is.... DEFINITELY YES!!! kakakaka u know why!!!

coz don't have to see boss Black Face, Shout by he/she and managing someone else employees hhhahhaha Phoenix will share more about her ex-bosses when she is really really free.. maybe next page ;P now, watch TV first relax relax

Sometimes When We Touch

You asked me if I loved you and I Choked on my reply,
I rather hurt you honestly, that miss lead you with a lie,
And who am I to judge you, on what you say or do,
I'm only just beginning, to see the real you,
And sometimes when we touch, the honestly to much,
And I have to close my eyes and hide.
I want to hold you 'til I die, 'til we both break down and cry,
I wanna hold you 'till the fear in me subsides....

Romancing all his strategie, leaves me battling with my pride,
But through the insecurity, some tenderness survives,
I'm just another writer, still trapped within my truths,
A hesitant prized fighter, still trapped within my youth.

And sometimes when we touch, the honesty too much,
And I have to close my eyes and hide,
I want to hold you 'til I die, 'til we both break down and cry,
I wanna hold you 'til the fear in me subsides.

At times I like to break you and drag you to your knees,
At times I like to break through and hold you endlessly,
At times I understand you, and I know how hard you've tried,
I watched why love commands you and I watched love pass you by,
At times I think we're drifters, still searching for a friend, a brother or a sister,

But then the passion flares again, and sometimes when we touch,
The honestly to much. And I have to close my eyes and hide,
I want to hold you 'til I die 'til we both break down and cry,
I wanna hold you 'til the fear in me subsides.

Close to you

Why do birds suddenly apprear every time you are near,
Just like me, they long to be Close to you,
Why do stars fall down from the sky,
Every time you walk by Just like me,
They long to be Close to you.
On the day that you were born and the angels got together,
And decided to create a dream come true,
So they sprinkled moon dust in your hair of gold,
And starlight in your eyes of blue,
That is why all the girls in town,
Follow you all around,
Just like me, they long to be Close to you.

On the day that you were born and the angles got together,
and decided to create a dream come true,
So they sprinkled moon dust in your hair of gold......
And start in your eyes of blue,
That is why all the girls in town, follow you all around,
Just like me, they long to be Close to you,
Just like me, they long to be Close to you.

Happy B'day Mr. A

First, sing you a song... happy b'day to u, happy b'day to u, happy b'day to u.. u.. happy b'day to uuuuuuuuuuuuu

Another year passed, welcome new year and challenges. It also means that you are growing mentally and fizically (in my own context) - that is what Phoenix hope for sure. Life have not being easy - she knows. No matter what still have to move on and keep faith close to heart and always remember that We Loves U.

New job, new environment, new bosses, new colleagues... hmmm how!! take it easy babe. Trust that this new environment is definitely much better then the previous as honestly you are much more happier and jovial. In corporate life, everyone have to struggle for living. It just a matter of how we look and action on the situation. Phoenix know say easy hahaha.... she go through the path right! Enjoy it instead of go againts it.. Dance with the flow! work smart!

For now, wish you all the best - stay healthy always and live long ... muacks frm your loving family Little Phoenix and Phoenix

Wonderful Day

Today is very first time Phoenix have her own blog page. Thanks to her 'sifu' - J. She is very updated wor ;P although she is a bit... hmmm.. how should Phoenix put it.. 'senior' hahahaha..

She taught Phoenix over the chat box. So consider Phoenix a fast learner. Like praising herself ;P, yah infact kakakaka   Phoenix have being thinking of how others doing their blog page... finally, she got one yahooooooooo!! it is so nice to have a room for her own thinking, talking, believes, space and overall her feeling as a whole. Or else it is such a pain to find someone to talk too .. what if they don't really want to hear as well :( at least now there is place call her 'HOME' in heart to write and share her thoughts.

Tomorrow is Phoenix dearest hubby b'day.. such a coincidence. It will sure be memorable birthday in their life as it print its' marked on her blog from now onwards and hope they will be reading it after 10 years down the road or 20 years or maybe 30 years. How sweet thinking about it!!

Do hope one day Baby Phoenix can read mommy's 'HOME' and remember how much mommy's luvs her. You will always be my baby. Be good and stay healthy always.